I suppose it began when I really started to notice that I am no longer in lock-step with my peers. I saw that some friends and acquaintances have been progressing in their careers, while others are earning impressive academic titles. Some have gotten married and started families, while still others have purchased homes. A select few have done all that and then some!
All of those things are truly great things and I am, on an intellectual level, very proud and happy for those people. Yet on an emotional level I often found myself wondering, what the hell are you doing with YOUR life, Ryan?
And to that I would answer (most recently): I’m living in a student dormitory yet again with a shower that zaps me from time to time, a ‘kitchen’ the size of shoebox, and having tortellini pesto for the umpteenth time for dinner in a locked down city where I know all of five people.
But I’m finally – and thankfully – realizing that life really is NOT a race. There is no right or wrong way to live it, and, well, when shit happens you gotta deal with it. All you can do is be the best version of yourself that you can be, when you can be, and nothing more. When friends and family back home reach milestones they are doing just that, and they certainly don’t deserve any ill-will for it just because I feel that I am “falling behind”.
As a note to my future self (and to anyone else who cares): life’s a journey, not a race. Make the best of where you are and when you are – even if that’s a run-down student dorm during a pandemic. If nothing else it’ll make for a great story someday, like that time the Hausmeister ensured you that your shower is okay to use because – despite the electric current that sometimes runs through the water – you “won’t die in the shower.”
Much love y’all and get vaccinated!
Ryry
