Chasing Your Dreams

Hi everyone, 

I’d like to take you on a little trip a few years back. It’s the fall of 2016. Having returned in the spring that year from Bhubaneswar, India – where I spent my last semester as an undergraduate student at GVSU – I put off moving back in with the ‘rents as long as possible by working first as a camp counselor at a German language immersion camp in Minnesota, and then as a hiking guide for German tourists in the Canadian Rockies. As summer came to a close and I finally faced the inevitable, I returned to Howell and took on a couple odd jobs while preparing for the next major step in my life. 

During this time I felt a certain mix of emotions: excited that I had finished undergrad and could do whatever I wanted; overwhelmed that I had finished undergrad and could do whatever I wanted; and, of course, antsy to ‘get my life started’. It was a regular old quarter-life-crisis. 

It was at this point that I distinctly remember having a conversation with my mother in the kitchen during which I said something to the effect of, I think I’d like to spend the next five years living abroad (probably much to her horror – sorry ma!). You see, there weren’t many things I was sure of regarding my life back then, yet one thing I did know: that I wanted to spend my 20s living overseas. Life just seemed too short and the world too big not to. So I began the long process of applying for the English Program in Korea with my sights set on shipping out in the spring of 2017. 

And well, over five years, four ultimate frisbee teams, three cities, two countries, a pandemic, master’s degree, and a long-ass bike ride later, here I am! It truly goes by quicker than you think. There were of course many unplanned adventures along the way, like taking a trip to a contested island in the East Sea (독도 우리 땅! ;) or having a stay at a nudist campsite in the middle of France (it’s more fun than you think!). Indeed, I’ve got about 5 journals full of tales such as these. 

Now, did I know I was going to do all that (and then some) when I had that conversation with my mother back then? Of course not! But it all happened simply because I chased a goal and I took the opportunities I was afforded along the way. I tried to approach each new situation and encounter with a why not? Instead of a why? And it was totally worth it. Not because I want to collect stories for my grandchildren, but because achieving something, doing something, learning something, just feels fantastic. 

So to you, dear reader, having managed to put up with my ramblings for this long, my parting piece of advice is this: chase your dreams and say yes to anything and everything you can. It’s your life after all, and you only get one of them. Let it be an adventure to be experienced. Have a roadmap, but don’t let that deter you from taking the scenic route. 

It certainly won’t be all sunshine and rainbows. Indeed, there were moments of intense loneliness when I was abroad, moments where I doubted myself and what I was doing living so far away from home. There were (too many) tearful goodbyes and an immense amount of frustration when the world went into lockdown and plans needed to be readjusted. There were times when I felt I was missing out on everything happening back home. 

But dammit, I chased my dreams. I said yes to things, and I came out the end a better person for it. I hope you do too. 

So what’s next for me? 

Funnily enough, I find myself currently in a strangely similar situation to the one I was in a few years ago. Having returned home and worked several odd jobs (family landscaper and babysitter) I now await my next Lebensabschnitt: this time as a Global Mobility Coordinator and Immigration Specialist with Lufthansa in New York. I suppose this will be a bit of a different (domestic) undertaking, but I look forward to it all the same. 

For those who have followed along and supported my journey these past few years, thank you! I hope I’ve inspired you to go on an adventure of your own, no matter how big or small. Just go do. Learn to find the joy in all things, good or otherwise. 

“With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.” – Desiderata 

Much love, 

Ryry

On Saying Goodbye

It’s spring again, which means for me time to move once more – my fourth time in five years. I’d like to think I’ve gotten the hang of saying goodbyes at this point, but I feel like the more I do the harder they become. They’re exhausting and emotionally draining to the point that this time I almost felt like skipping the process altogether. In a way I feel like a masochist, repeatedly subjecting myself to the same painful process year after year. 

And yet, goodbyes are necessary. 

Goodbyes allow you to reflect on the time you’ve had with people. They are a part of everyone’s narrative and learning how to deal with them is an important life lesson. They teach you to confront the finality of our existence and to be aware of the people you have in your life – wherever and whenever that is. They’re a chance to tell friends and family how much they mean to you and you to them. And, if nothing else, they’re a chance for you to purge some of your belongings before hitting the road again. Still, that doesn’t necessarily make them any easier. 

I’ve often told people here that the reason I want to move back home is to be closer to family – and I do – but what of my family I’ve made over the past several years living an ocean or two away from home? How do I say goodbye to them? To people who have taught me so much and with whom I’ve been able to share so many wonderful experiences? How do you look someone in the eyes who’s become such an integral part of your life and say, Tschüss, schön war’s! 

Indeed, if there’s a schmerzfreie method of saying goodbye, I’m all ears. Yet I suppose in the end all you really can do is be gracious for the time you’ve been able to share with people. Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened, right? I also like to think of these encounters more as a see you later rather than a goodbye. Indeed, as a good friend of mine recently told me, the world is smaller and our hearts are bigger than we think. In this life or the next, we’ll all see each other again someday. 

To those who have been a part of my life in Ulsan, Fulda, and Regensburg over these past five years, thank you. You’ve enriched my life in countless ways. Don’t ever hesitate to reach out!

On Friendship

Hey all, it's been a minute. Not a whole lot has changed in my life since my last post. Still living in Regensburg while working and finishing up my degree (graduation spring 2022, here I come!). Where I end up at the end of this year is still a mystery, but I digress.

An old friend of mine from my days in Munich came and visited this past week and it was really quite grand. We drank beer and reminisced, got some work done for our respective universities, visited old haunts and made a couple new memories, and all-in-all just had a good-ass time. After all, that's what friends are for; are they not?

Yes, this past week served as a gentle reminder of something quite important in life - friendship. I'm quite lucky to have had the experiences in life that I have, but I'm even more grateful to have met the people that I have. 

During my time with the ski team at GVSU we used to have a little saying we'd joke about: If you're getting rad but nobody sees it, are you really getting rad? I mean are you?! I only remember this phrase because it was often uttered during the ridiculous games of G.N.A.R. we used to play on our ski weekends (and if one of you ski team alums is reading this, I'M THE BEST SNOWBOARDER ON THE MOUNTAIN!) Yet there still lies an interesting little kernel of truth in that saying. My time with the GVSU ski team was so special precisely because of all the goofy shit we did together as a team. I suppose a more appropriate version of this saying would be: If you're getting rad but have no one to share it with, are you really getting rad?

Human connection is indeed a wonderful thing that deserves to be cherished. The people I've met are the reason why my experiences in life were and continue to be as great as they have been. I suppose that's a large part of why this pandemic has been so difficult for so many of us.

In any event, if you happen to be reading this, take a moment and reach out to an old friend or acquaintance and tell them why you're glad to have had them in your life. No matter how strange you think it may be or how short your time together was, I'm sure they'd love to hear from you.

Life is a journey. Be grateful for the companions you've had and look forward to those that are to come. But above all cherish the presence of those in whose company you currently find yourself. That's living.

Thanks for the great time and thanks for being you, Elsa Smelsa.